


Ardent Alliance

by supple_supplicant



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Background Relationships, Camping, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everyone is over 21, F/M, Fluff, M/M, Put your pitchforks away, Shiro (Voltron) Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Trigger warning for abduction & kidnap
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-22
Updated: 2016-10-18
Packaged: 2018-08-16 19:01:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8113855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supple_supplicant/pseuds/supple_supplicant
Summary: Shiro is a polite 32 year old trying to deal and heal from a dark past. He is invited to a birthday party by Matt, the lab tech at his psychiatrist's office. Shiro is in for a wild ride after Matt's little sister stumbles into his life.





	1. Chapter 1

Shiro sat on the edge of his bed, head cradled in his hands. He felt like he was suffocating despite his deep gasping breaths. Looking up and around his small, bare studio apartment his vision swam. He unsuccessfully tried to stop the rapid jiggling of his leg. The small room, that usually was his safe place, felt stale and stifling. He needed to get out. Go for a run and lose himself in the resulting endorphins. 

Pound pound, his feet on the pavement. Pound Pound, the generic electronica on his earbuds. Pound pound, the blood rushing through his face. These beats did not entirely silence the negative rhythm in his head. “You’re scared. You’re weak. You’re damaged goods.” over and over again. He pushed harder and picked up speed. A few moments later is running trance was disrupted by a can of olives rolling across his path on the sidewalk. He stopped and plucked his headphones from his ears. He swooped down to capture the runaway olives, jogging over to the little old lady who had dropped them. She stood at the open trunk of her car. It was packed with grocery bags. One bag lay on the ground and was clearly the source of the rouge can.

Shiro flashed her his winning smile and asked, “May I help you with these ma'am?”

Her wrinkled face cracked into a beaming grin. “Thank you kind young man.”

Shiro loaded his arms up with paper sacks and followed her as she shuffled to her wide open front door. “Just set them on the counter dear.”

Shiro deposited his armload and returned the the car for the remaining bags. Balancing one on his hip to gently closed the trunk. After politely accepting the muffin she insisted on giving him he returned to the sidewalk. He did not resume his punishing workout, content to stroll leisurely home munching on the pastry. The genuine smile on her sweet, elderly face had been tonic to his nerves.

-

Shiro sat behind the front desk at his job. Trying to read a fitness magazine, but he was preoccupied—checking the clock every 2 minutes. Keith was already 5 minutes late. Keith was by far his favorite coworker at Garrison gym. However, his regular tardiness and general disregard of rules left Shiro anxious (more anxious) that his friend would be fired. Right on cue his boss, whom they secretly referred to as “the drill sergeant”, stormed out of his office and demanded, “Where is that insubordinate long haired pillok?” 

“I’m not sure, sir. He has not responded to my text message. Fortunately, his first training appointment is not until noon.” Shiro responded.

Mr. Authoritarian was unimpressed. “I gave you a promotion so you can whip him into shape, not cover up for him.” 

“I’m sorry sir. I will work on it.” Shiro called out to his retreating back. Roughly 10 minutes later Keith walked in, completely unashamed at his lateness. 

Shiro’s voice was scolding but kind, “Come on man. You have to start showing up on time.” 

“It’s no big deal. I would have been on time if I had an appointment first thing. It was only like 15 minutes and we are always dead this time of day.” 

“That is what I tried to tell the boss, but he laid into me because it’s my job to keep you “in line.” So please just make an effort. I know how capable you are, you don’t apply yourself because you don’t feel challenged. You are talented and dedicated. You could own your own gym one day if you really work hard. Patience yields focus. Don’t let a bossy boss keep you from giving your all.” 

“I guess,” Keith said scowling up through his bangs, “I’m doing it for you though. Not for Major Dickhead. Let the record show.” 

-

Later that day Shiro sat in a plastic waiting room chair, the same fitness magazine closed on his lap. He had a thousand mile stare as he tried to come up with the best words to describe the panic attack this morning. Better verbalizing lead to better help, his pyciatrist had told him on several occasions. It was only 10 minutes until he would be in Dr. Banks’ office, so Shiro was trying to sort out his words now. Matt, who was Dr. Banks’ receptionist and lab tech, walked into the room and handed Shiro a soda. 

“You can have this. The machine gave me two.” He said leaning casually against his desk.

“Thank you very much.” Shiro responded politely as he popped the tab. 

“Have you had a chance to get out and enjoy this nice weather?” Matt asked idly.

“Oh yes! I went for a run this morning. It was lovely.” 

“All you ever talk about is working out.” Matt chuckled.

“It IS my job you know.”

“I’d say you need a hobby and some friends.” 

Shiro broke eye contact and fiddled with the edges of is magazine.

“Sorry. That came out way harsh,” Matt said quickly “I’m actually trying to ask you if have any plans for this coming Saturday.” 

“I have nothing planned.” Shiro said with a hint of suspicion. “Why do you ask?”

“Saturday is my birthday. I am having a party at my place. Just hanging out, having a few drinks with friends & family. It would be cool if you came. I enjoy chatting with you every week. We should hang outside of this waiting room.”

Shiro blushed, “That is very kind of you. I wouldn’t want to intrude…”

“Not at all,” Matt laughed as he scribbled a time and address on a post-it note.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is going places. It was basically the fanfic I really wanted to read, but could not find. I guess I will have to birth it instead. I suck at grammar and spelling. No one read this before I posted. Constructive criticism is welcome.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drink in moderation kids.

Shiro walked in the open front door. His manners were yelling at him to knock first, but the door was open for a reason. The crowd inside was far too loud for his polite knock to be heard anyway. There were around 20 people crammed into the small living room / kitchen combo. Every surface contained sitting people, snacks, and half consumed drinks. Shiro stood with his back to the wall scanning somewhat desperately for the familiar reddish hair of the birthday boy. Shiro spotted him in the midst of a large circle and they made eye contact. He was quite relieved that his new friend came over to say hello instead of motioning Shiro into the circle of strangers. 

“Shiro! I’m so glad you made it man.” 

“Thank you for inviting me Matt.” 

“Make yourself at home. We have snacks, and pizza coming out of the oven in a few. Do you want a drink?“ 

Shiro thought it would be less awkward if he had something to do with his hands. 

“Sure. Whatever you’re having is fine” He said as he eyed Matt’s red solo cup. 

“That would be the rum punch over here. It’s really good.”

Shiro followed close behind Matt as he weaved through the bedlam. Shiro recoiled and whipped around when a small body bumped against his back. He looked down into the face of a girl who was obviously related to Matt. She had the same red-blonde hair, only longer.

“I am so, so sorry!” She exclaimed. “Matt insisted I wear this skirt and I keep tripping over it.” 

“I see you have met my little sister Katie the klutz.” Matt laughed.

“Please call me Pidge.” She reached out to shake Shiro’s hand. There was an awkward moment when she had to switch hands. Shiro always offered his flesh hand instead of the prosthetic one. He knew it weirded some people out to touch it.

“Oh wow! Your arm is so cool! What is it made out of?” She said, brightening considerably.

“Katie! That is inappropriate!” Matt rolled his eyes. “Could you be any more awkward?” 

Shiro chuckled, “It’s alright Matt. I prefer this over how most people pretend not to be staring at it.” 

“Can I touch it and have a closer look?” Her eyes were wide with anticipation.

Shiro watched her unrestrained, excited expressions as she studied his high tech prosthetic. He thought it was nice how expressive her face was. She was rather cute too. Pink tinged his cheeks at that thought, unnoticed by the enthralled geek. It would be discourteous to hit on the sister of someone who was trying to befriend him. Off limits. She was also a foot shorter than him, which indicated youth. Shiro thought she could still be in high school. Extremely off limits!

After Pidge’s thorough inspection of his arm they mumbled a few awkward words of small talk. It was thankfully short lived because Pidge ran off to greet her friend Lance who had just arrived. Shiro made for the nearest wall to stand against. It was impossible to avoid brushing up against people as he went. Shiro backed up against the wall trying to take up as little space as possible and took a drink. The sweet punch barely tasted like alcohol. It was rather warm with all the bodies in one room. He glanced around, avoiding eye contact with anyone. It was all rather overwhelming. He took another swig from his cup for something to do. Should he talk to someone? He never knew how to behave at these things. The nearest conversation was about celebrity couples. He had nothing to contribute on that subject. He took another drink and noticed that the cup was almost empty. Hey, at least refilling his drink would give him something to do apart from staring around like a weirdo. 

-

There was a cool breeze on the back patio. Pidge and Lance were enjoying it as they argued good naturedly. 

“You are so full of it! What about all the features they said it would have but didn’t?” Lance said as he gestured his arms wildly.

“I didn’t pay attention to any of that. I just bought the game, played it, and liked it. I can set myself down in a sandbox and be happy. I think you are just bandwagoning because most of the internet doesn’t like it.” Pidge was treated to Lance’s classic drama queen face.

“How dare you! I’ve never based my opinion on what the rest of…”

Their banter was interrupted by the back door banging open suddenly. Shiro stumbled out onto the back step swaying visibly. Lance only had time to cock an eyebrow and open his mouth for a wisecrack before Shiro fainted. He crumpled suddenly, without grace. Pidge rushed to kneel beside his head.

“Are you alright, dude?! What’s wrong?” She blustered. 

“I think he just drank too much.” Lance said “We should get his head up. I watched a show once where a guy choked on his own vomit.”

Lance gripped both of Shiro’s shoulders and lifted him off the ground a bit. Pidge slid her legs into the space and Lance lowered him to rest on her. She wiped his black hair back off his clammy forehead. She ran her fingers through his hair a few more times trying to both wake him and sooth him. 

“I am going to get him some water.” Lance said as he made for the door.

“Why am I holding this guy?” Pidge shouted as Lance walked away. “What if something goes wrong? What if he does throw up? I’ve never drank, I don’t know if I would recognize the symptoms of alcohol poisoning. What if he needs a hospital? What if he dies in my arms?!” Her tone becoming more frantic with each unanswered question. She jumped when Shiro responded from her lap.

“You’re rambling. I will be fine, I just need to rest and breath some fresh air for awhile. Matt once told me, “If you get to worried about what could go wrong, you might miss a chance to do something great.”

“He got that from our Dad. He said it all the time before he passed away.”

Silence fell between them. Lance had shut the door behind him, muffling the sounds of the party. Pidge was surprised to find that the silence was peaceful as opposed to awkward.

Shiro sighed, “You could also keep stroking my hair like you did before. If you wanted to. I didn’t hate that.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro gets a chance to buy Pidge apology coffee.

A little bell tinkled above his head as Shiro entered his favorite cafe. It was noon and the line was considerable. He stood a respectful distance behind the last person in the queue. It had been a week since his drunken episode, and he still felt a twinge of humiliation every time he thought about it. He had been handed an opportunity for normal socialization on a platter and he had barfed all over it. Humiliating intoxication was supposed to be a thing that young people did. He supposed a case could be made to excuse himself as a late bloomer. He had spent most of his 20’s in self imposed isolation rather than partying it up. 

He glanced up at the menu board. He always got green tea, but we wanted to have his order completely prepped before he stepped up to the counter. As his gaze dropped he noticed a short redhead two people ahead of him in line. His heart leapt to his throat. It was Matt’s sister Pidge. Oh shit! For a brief moment he considered slinking back out the door before he was noticed. He dismissed the idea, he wasn’t one to run from his mistakes. Besides, if he never made the effort she would only ever think of him as “that drunk dude.” 

“Excuse me. Pidge, is that you?” He inquired. 

She whirled around, almost dropping the phone in her hand. Her eyes widened and she cracked a smile. She was looking far more comfortable in the hoodie and shorts she wore today than she had in the floor length skirt she had worn the night they met. 

“Hey Shiro! Good to see you feeling better.” She said warmly.

Shiro felt his cheeks warm slightly. He could have been climbing out of a dumpster and looked better than he had the last time they were together. Still though, she had remembered his name.

“Much better, thank you. I am glad I bumped into you. I wanted to apologize for the spectacle I caused last week. I had never done anything like that before, and you were really great about it. So, thanks.” He looked deeply into her eyes as he said this, hoping to convey his sincerity.

“No problem. I didn’t do anything really.” She said dismissively as she gave up her spot in line to move back next to him. 

“You were kind and supportive. That meant a lot. Please at least allow me to buy your drink in apology and gratitude.”

“Naw.” she waved a hand “You don’t need to do that. Besides, I drink The Beast which has like 4 extra shots in it. Meaning it is like two bucks more expensive than anything else.”

“I want to, it is the least I could do. Please let me. It will assuage my guilt and you get free coffee.” 

She shrugged, “If it is that important to you.”

Shiro smiled with delight. “Good. You can go get us a table if you like. I will get your Beastly latte.”

Their conversation was light, trivial, but pleasant. Shiro talked about his personal trainer job and training schedule. He asked her if she was in school. She said she was and launched into an in depth explanation of why computer science was the best subject in the world.

“It falls on me to maintain these ancient servers. My professor says that it is good practice for the job market. I even offered to help build new ones, but he says that I will have to clear that with the head of the department first. Psh. Why would anyone object to upgrades though?” She said rolling her eyes. 

“Aren’t you a little young for that?” Shiro cocked an eyebrow at her.

“Geeze! I am 21! I’m not a baby anymore. No matter what Matt says.” She responded huffily.

“Oh. I, uh, didn’t realize. Matt is so young. I guess I just assumed that you were still in high school” A warm hand clenched his gut.   
“I’m still an old man by comparison, though.” He’s reminding himself as much as he is telling her. 

“How old are you?” 

“I’m 32, but sometimes I feel like I’m going on 50.” A pause. “And sometimes I feel like a stupid kid. Your brother’s birthday for instance.” Self deprecating humor was always a safe bet. 

“You’re pretty trim for an old dude.” Pidge observed with a nod. 

Shiro fully blushed this time. His brain was like a deer in the headlights, he was saved from having to stutter out a response though. Pidge checked the time on her phone and hopped up. 

“I’m late for a study group. I am glad we got a chance to chat. Matt is right, you are a cool dude. We should exchange phone numbers.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro is bad at texting but good at cooking. The gang hangs out in the park and Lance goes on a tirade about "that Keith guy."

Shiro had never been much of a texter. The only people he texted regularly were Keith, Allura, and his mother. Even then, it was always to convey specific information rather than to chat. Pidge, the wired in wiz kid on the other hand, sent an average of a hundred texts per day. She sent him jokes and asked about his day. The frequent contact made Shiro smile as he laboriously hunted and pecked out his replies to her. 

Shiro was in the locker room toweling off after a quick shower. He heard his phone buzz loudly against the metal locker.

Pidge Holt: Got anything going on later?

Shiro’s heart kicked it’s pace up a notch. He searched for the “I” button on the little keyboard display. 

Shiro: I do not have any plans. Why do you ask?

Pidge Holt: I’m hanging out in the park with some friends at 2:00. You should come.

“What’s up man?” Keith broke into Shiro’s focus.

“Huh? Nothing is up.” He responded recovering from the startle.

“If you say so, but you were grinning at your phone.” Keith shrugged. “It was a bit creepy.” 

-

Pidge, Lance, and Hunk lounged on the grass beside the duck pond. 

Hunk broke through the silence suddenly, “Hate to be the voice of reason, always. But didn't your brother meet this guy in a psychiatrist office? What do you actually know about this guy? What if he is an axe murderer? Wasn’t he drunk the first time you met him? He could be an alcoholic axe murderer!”

“He didn’t seem all murdery to me.” Lance shrugged. “Just like a dude who didn’t know how much rum was in the punch.” 

They both jumped a little when Pidge pointed and exclaimed “There he is!” 

He was still too far away to hear, but Hunk fidgeted a bit anyway. Shiro wore a leather jacket and he was walking along the path pushing an old motorbike. 

“Sorry I’m late! I always try to be 5 min early to everything, but my motorcycle broke down on the way here. I had to walk it the rest of the way here in the bike lane.” 

“I may be able to help out.” Hunk chimed in. “I’m Hunk, and I happen to be a mechanic.” 

Hunk pulled a pencil case of tools from his backpack. Lance rolled his eyes behind his friend’s back. Shiro settled himself on the grass while Hunk got to work on the old machine. Pidge hovered over his shoulder watching with interest. Occasionally saying “Oh.” and “So that’s how that works.” 

“All done. It shouldn’t give you trouble anymore.” Hunk said smiling, after a surprisingly short amount of time.

“Hunk you gassy genius.” Lance patted him on the back.

Hunk put his tools away and began to wipe his hands off with a moist towelette from his pack. Lance and Pidge gazed down at their phones. Shiro was enjoying the scenery. He had been to this park, but hadn’t strayed from the running path. Of course it was Lance to break the peaceful moment. 

“Argh! I can’t stop hate-reading my rivals blog. Stupid Keith and his stupid mullet. I can't stand that guy” 

“Keith with a mullet? Do you mean Keith Kogane who works at Garrison gym?” Shiro said with surprise.

“Yeah! You know that asshole? Does he ever talk about me?! Oh my god! Tell me everything!” 

Lance leaned a few inches closer to Shiro with wide, pleading eyes. Shiro leaned away a few inches on instinct.

“You sure care a lot about the opinion of a guy you can't stand.” Hunk observed. 

“Not to mention the amount of time you spend talking about him.” Pidge chimed in without looking up from her phone. 

“How do you know him?” Shiro inquired.

Lance took a deep dramatic breath before he began.

“I sling beers at a bar downtown called The Lions. Keith comes in sometimes. He always sits in the corner alone and doesn’t talk to anyone. He just looks around at everyone like they are beneath him, because they aren’t all buff like he is. What a freak! Not to mention he always orders gin and tonic can you say laaaaaaaame!” 

“Keith is alright. I know he can seem a bit stand-offish at first, but really it is just because he’s shy. He doesn’t like initiating conversations. His work and hobby revolve around the gym so he gets nervous about not having any other interesting topics to discuss.” Shiro said reasonably.

Lance seemed a bit flustered for a moment. He seemed to search the cloudless sky for a good response.

“Yeah! Well, that is no excuse for playing out the old n’ tired “dark mysterious tough guy” act.” 

Hunk chuckled under his breath.

“Oh yeah, because that has NEVER done it for you. It’s not like you are totally obsessed with everything James Bond.” 

“Don’t you DARE bring 007 into this! He is smooth as silk and tough as nails.” Lance’s voice was full of reproach. 

Shiro cut in, “No need to fight now boys. I thought we might get hungry so I packed us some food. Hope you guys like onigiri.” 

The gang happily munched their rice dumplings.

“Holy crow these are delicious!” Lance said.

“Any guy that can cook like this is worth holding onto Pidge.” Hunk said giving her the side eye.

Pidge flushed red at these words. “I’m not holding him! I mean, I suppose I did that one time, but that was because he needed me to, not because he wanted me to.” 

Then it was Shiro’s turn to blush. Hunk grinned in a knowing fashion and said,

“Do you like camping Shiro?”

“I love it! The peace and quiet always do me some good.”

“Then you should come with us next week! I always end up being the only one in charge of food, with your skills we could split the work 50/50.” 

Shiro looked towards Pidge before saying,

“I...I’m not sure. I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

“You should come. Might be a good idea to have a REAL adult to look after us youngins.” she winked and stuck her tongue out at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Formatting dialogue is hard. Sorry if I fucked it up. Once again, y'all are the first to read this besides me.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yay camping shenanigans!  
> Keith and Lance get their bonding moment in this chapter.  
> Shiro is also confronted with the reality that Pidge possesses a pair of boobs. Revelation. Haha.

Shiro and Keith went down to stand on the dock as soon as they arrived at the campsite. They stood on opposite ends of the wooden protrusion. Silently soaking up the majestic beauty of the alpine river. They had always been well suited for each other's friendship. Though fierce and determined when the situation called for it, they both relished the serene quiet moments life sometimes offered. 

As they climbed back up the hill, they saw the rest of the gang climbing out of Hunk’s yellow station wagon. Hunk was yawning and Pidge was stretching. Lance noticed them first.

“Oh no!” He shouted as he crossed his arms tightly, “Shiro did NOT bring Keith to ruin our epic camping trip.” 

“Pidge told me it was alright to bring him.” Shiro said uncertainly.

“Do, we know each other?” Keith asked with narrowed eyes.

“Uh yeah. It’s Lance.” Lance paused for recognition that didn't come. “You always come into the bar I work at.” 

“Oh, you must mean The Lions. Are you a bouncer?”

“No! I’m a bartender.” 

“Oh yeah, right. You were the one who recommended that frilly drink special.” 

Lance gasped and clutched his imaginary pearls.   
“That was a blue daiquiri, for your information. I came up with it, and it was delicious I will have you know.”

“Would you two stop bickering like an old married couple and help us unload?” Hunk cut in.

“Ugh, fiiiiine. But I’m not going to have any fun while he’s around.” Lance said with a pout.

After camp was set up they decided to go for a hike to a waterfall indicated on the trail map. It was not a long or difficult hike. They walked along pleasantly discussing the things they would do during the long weekend away. 

Pidge was leading the party when a couple of small furry shapes suddenly darted across the path in front of them. She leapt behind Shiro and sprung onto his shoulders, clinging for dear life.

“Oh shit! What was that?!” Lance said as he gripped Keith’s arm. 

Pidge scrambled down from Shiro’s shoulders embarrassed, “It’s just...uh... whatever that thing is”

“I’m pretty sure it was just a couple of racoons you guys. They’re not going to hurt us.” Shiro said repressing a laugh.

Lance released his vice-like grip on Keith’s forearm.   
“Yeah, sure. Raccoons. I would never be afraid of anything as small as a racoon.” 

“Say whatever you gotta say to make yourself feel better.” Keith shot back.

-

That night around the campfire Hunk and Lance had a s’mores eating contest. Pidge whined only a little when her phone ran out of battery. Shiro told an excellent spooky story about aliens that left them all quietly glancing around the dark woods. 

Hunk jumped a mile when Lance said, “Shhhh. I think I hear something guys….” Everyone groaned at the fart he then let rip. Everyone but Lance, who was too busy being pleased with himself.

Shiro was first awake the next morning. He liked the fresh morning air of the mountains. It was several hours later that Pidge came stumbling out of her tent. She wore green pjs with a pattern of circuit boards on them. Her long hair stuck up with static charge after a night in the tent. Shiro smiled at her cuteness and said,

“Good morning Pidge. Did you sleep well?”

“Coffee first, words later.” Pidge grunted at him.

Shiro turned away to hide his smirk. He dug through a tote looking for the coffee percolator. He had bought one specially for this trip. He had guessed that little Ms. Beast coffee would be greatful.

-

The gang decided to spend that afternoon on the water. Shiro had noticed a kayak rental sign in front of the campground office. They rented all three of the remaining kayaks. Dividing of their group into 3 parts was a bit uncomfortable. Shiro and Pidge looked meaningfully at each other. Lance and Hunk fist bumped to show their decision to team up. Keith was left on his own, rubbing a foot in the dirt. He tried to ease the awkward moment by saying,

“It will be a better upper body workout this way.” 

That actually made Shiro feel more awkward. Really he should be in a boat with Keith since he brought him as a guest. He just couldn‘t pass up the opportunity to spend some time with Pidge. Her excited smile was enough to blow his guilt away. 

Back at camp Shiro hoisted his small survival pack to his back and looked up at Pidge. She was at the head of the trail to the lake, practically prancing with excitement.

“Someone is feeling exuberant.” He commented with a wide grin.

“I know, I’m just really looking forward to this. Can we go? I know the others still have to change, but my suit is underneath my sweatshirt. Are you ready?” She jabbered.

“I am. Let’s go.”

It was the perfect day to be out on the water. They appreciated the sublime view as they paddled lazily with the current. They occasionally pointed out features to each other, such as water fowl or cloud formations. After some time, a small island with a few scant trees came into view.

“It’s hot. I kind of want to swim to that island and rest for a bit.” Pidge said and shaded her eyes with her hand for a better look. “Maybe not though, it might be too far off.”

“Go, be great. I will follow along behind in the kayak. I won’t let anything happen to you.” 

Pidge’s face lit up in a smile that warmed and melted Shiro’s heart. She cautiously stood up while Shiro worked at keeping the boat stable. She stripped off her top layer revealing her swimming suit. It was nothing fancy, just some black swim trunks and a green bikini top with thick straps. Shiro suddenly felt out of breath. All at once he was faced with the existence of her breasts, which he had never considered before. They were small, well shaped, and had always been hidden under baggy clothes during their previous interactions. Her skin was pale and unblemished. He was pulled from this reverie when she shouted “Woohoo!” and leapt over the side. She was a fairly strong swimmer and made it to the island in short order. Shiro drug their kayak up onto the sand. 

“I knew you could do it.” he told her with a proud smile. She returned it, in spite of her mild panting from the exertion of swimming. She flopped down onto the sand to dry in the sun and Shiro lowered himself down to sit beside her. 

“That was fun.” Pidge said dreamily. “I wonder if Hunk and Lance are having as good a time as us”

-

The rest of the gang were in the water and only a few feet from the dock. Lance and Keith were fighting. Obviously. 

“You are such a showoff!” Lance said crossly.

“I didn’t say that you guys had to come with me,” Keith responded irritably. “I just said that I wanted to paddle upstream instead. I want to try and make it to the waterfall we saw yesterday.”

“Oh no!” Lance exclaimed, “You are NOT beating me at kayaking.” He clutched his paddle to his chest and clumsily leapt into Keith’s kayak nearly turning it over. 

Hunk called out, “Don’t leave me alone in this thing! I’ve never tried to paddle one alone before.” 

“You will be fine! If Keith can do it, any idiot can.” 

“What if I lose my paddles and I can’t steer? What if I start crying? Too late. I’m already crying” Hunk blubbered.

“You will be fine! I will come back to get you after I’m done showing this dork how it’s really done.” Lance shouted back to him. They aggressively paddled their craft upstream and around a bend out of sight. 

“Oh yeah Hunk. Just solo pilot this new water craft on a river that is totally unfamiliar, without a life jacket. While I go have a pissing contest with my secret crush-rival. But whatever...easy peasy….that all makes a ton of sense.” 

Hunk mumbled to himself as he haphazardly paddled his kayak straight to shore. 

“Phew! Alright. I made it to land safe and sound. Now what…. I could go back to camp and make myself a sandwich. *sigh* I better walk upstream and make sure those two aren’t in trouble.”

Meanwhile upstream, Lance and Keith were in trouble. Keith had called out that they should go left around the boulder and Lance argued that they should go right. The ensuing struggle had flipped the boat and dumped them both in the water. The boat and paddles washed away quickly. Now they were clinging to the offending boulder, breathing heavily.

“We should let the current carry us to shore. It will use less of our remaining energy. Just make sure you float feet first so that you can navigate around any rocks and hopefully don’t crack your head open.” Keith directed. 

“No way!” Lance protested. “I am not following the plan of the guy who got us into this mess in the first place.” 

Keith grabbed Lance’s hand, “Shut up and trust me.” 

They let the current take them, making occasional strokes to bring them closer to shore. It seemed that Keith’s plan worked perfectly as they got nearer and nearer to the river bank. That was until Lance shouted out “Leg cramp!”

-

Hunk was speed walking up the bank and worrying. 

“Oh man. This was supposed to be a nice relaxing trip with lots of snacks. Now your best friend probably drowned to death because you couldn’t stop him from being an idiot.” 

At that moment he looked up and in the distance he saw Keith hauling a limp Lance out of the water. 

“Holy crow! I was right!” Hunk said as he took off running. 

When he got there Lance was sprawled in Keith’s lap. He was laying on his side and coughing wetly as Keith patted his back. 

-

As Shiro and Pidge paddled back to camp, they came upon the runaway kayak stuck upside down in some reeds. 

“I hope they just forgot to beach it properly.” Shiro said anxiously as they retrieved it.

They paddled more quickly the rest of the way to the dock. They saw Hunks abandoned kayak and quickly leapt out of their own. They both started yelling for the others. Hunk shouted back and a moment later they saw their friends come around the bend. Unharmed, though Lance was walking a bit slumped over. 

After telling them the story Lance said, “Yeah. I should have expected to be put in mortal peril after Keith showed up.” 

Keith’s eyes grew wide with shock, “We had a bonding moment! I cradled you in my arms!” 

“Nope. All I remember was almost drowning.” 

Shiro interrupted their banter. “Well I’m glad everyone is ok. Let’s get back up to camp so Lance can rest awhile.” 

They proceeded up the trail to camp. Once there, the stood in silence for a moment. It looked as if a tornado had come through. Trash and food was strewn everywhere like so much flotsam and jetsam. It seemed that their racoon friends from the other day had raided their camp. 

Shiro broke the shocked silence, “I guess we broke into their home first. It's time to work as a team. Let’s get this cleaned up.” 

They bagged trash and brushed droppings into the brush with evergreen branches. Luckily one of the totes of food had been left untouched. That would have cut their trip short. Shiro let out grumble as he inspected his sagging tent. 

“What’s wrong Shiro?” Pidge asked.

“They found the emergency rations I had stashed in my tent.” 

Pidge giggled. “You brought emergency rations? You really act like a Dad sometimes, it’s adorable.” 

The rest of the group also laughed at this, as Shiro blushed. 

“Funny as that may be,” Shiro spoke over their mirth. “We still have a problem. They didn’t know how to work the zipper so they tore through the canvas instead. Meaning that Keith and I no longer have anywhere to sleep.” 

“Well I only have room for one more in my little tent. So Keith will have sleep with Hunk and Lance in the big tent.” Pidge said quickly not making eye contact with Shiro.

Lance literally threw himself down onto the ground like the toddler drama queen he was. Shiro just stepped over him. 

“Right. Let’s get our stuff moved over then.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the chapter where the kidnapping trigger warning applies. We get to hear Shiro's sad tale. If you want/need to skip it and get straight to the comforting each other part, I made a little row of 4 asterisks to indicate when his tale is over. 
> 
> I tried to end it on a lighthearted note. I know I can't help but giggle when I read the word boner.

Shiro was lying stiff and nervous in his sleeping bag. He was thinking about how much fun he had with Pidge today. He was trying NOT to think about how cute she looked in her swimming suit. He was definitely thinking about Matt’s reaction if he found out that he was sharing a tent with his sister. 

“Shiro?” Pidge’s voice suddenly broke the silence.

He jumped, “I thought you were asleep.” 

“No. I’ve always been a night owl, except usually I have my computers to keep me busy.”

“Of course you do.” Shiro chuckled.

There was a moment of silence. 

“I’m glad that you came on this camping trip. I know we haven’t known each other very long, but you are a good friend.”

Shiro blushed up at the dark tent top, “Thank you. That is nice to hear. I don’t have much practice. Keith and I pretty much only hang out at the gym. I only really see Matt at Dr. Banks’ office, except for his birthday. And well….You saw how well that went.” 

They chuckled together. 

Pidge asked, “It wasn’t all bad was it? I mean, you met me.” 

“Definitely the highlight of the evening.” He said allowed—internally he thought, more like highlight of my year. Maybe my life. 

“Shiro, would you tell me what happened to your arm?”

Shiro felt a sharp knife of fear and anxiety in his gut. More like a ball of knives really. He felt hot and clammy even though a night time chill had settled in the mountains. He tapped one set of toes against the bottom zipper of his sleeping bag. Trying to collect his thoughts. To funnel them into words.

She said, “You don’t have to tell me. I will be your friend anyway. I didn’t mean to pry.” 

Shiro turned his head towards her. His eyes had adjusted to the dark enough that he could see the outline of her face, “It’s not that. It’s just, hard. I guess I am embarrassed, which is silly. You have already seen me pass out from drinking. How much more could I humiliate myself, really? Even though we have only been friends a few weeks, I can tell that I can trust you. However, some things are difficult to put into words. That’s why Dr. Banks is always telling me to keep a journal.” 

He paused and rolled onto his back again. He took several slow and measured breaths, another tip from Dr. Banks. In the silence he heard a rustling from her sleeping bag. Next thing he knew a warm hand has snaked into his flesh one. Her thumb stroked his hand soothingly. She wanted to tell him nevermind, but she didn’t. That might sound like she isn’t interested, which is the opposite of true. She wanted to let him make his decision. She already told him that he had an out. So she waited silently and stroked his hand instead. 

He began in a monotone whisper. 

“I injured my arm at the same time I got the scar on my face. I was kidnapped. I was 12 years old and playing in my parents front yard when they abducted me. The guy approached me saying that he couldn’t find his daughter. She had been walking their puppy around the block and never came back he said. I wanted to help, I was worried for her. I had been taught stranger danger my whole life, but I got in his car without a second thought. There was another man in the backseat. I was always taught that kids should let adults sit up front. I tried to insist but they told me there was no time and drove off. The car smelled bad, that was my first indication that something was wrong. It smelled like chemicals. I thought of industrial cleaners, but it was actually chloroform. The man in the back seat wrapped his arm around my neck. While I choked and fought he pushed a chloroform rag over my face.” 

Shiro’s whole leg began to shake and twitch, not just his toes. His nose imagined the smell far too vividly. He tried the 3 breath trick again, this time the breaths shook with effort and emotions. 

Pidge whispered, “Would it be alright if I moved closer? I want to offer support but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” 

Shiro smiled a tight lipped smile. “That is very sweet of you, especially since you asked. A few years ago I might have said no. Now, I think I would like that.” 

Pidge scooted closer, sleeping bag and all. She rested her other hand on his forearm and laid her head so close to him that her forehead touched his shoulder. The twitching in his leg moved back down to his toe alone. His eyes burned. He wanted to tell her, to be honest and open. He wanted her to know him, and hopefully she would still want to know him after his tragic story. He was afraid though. Would she ever see him as anything but a victim? Her breath on his arm was soothing and so was the stroking thumb. He wanted more than anything to be the one to take care someone else. It was always him that needed nurturing and special considerations for his missing arm and trauma. He wanted to be strong enough to nurture and care for someone else. He would be. He was. As a matter fact he was strong enough to talk about this. Strong enough to trust Pidge. He had spent enough of his life skirting the subject to know that honesty and trust took strength. 

“I woke up with one hand chained to a bed frame. I was on a smelly mattress with no sheets. There was a bedpan by my head, it smelled even worse than the mattress even though it was empty.” His leg began its twitching rhythm again. Pidge shuffled a little closer. Now their clasped hands were nestled against her lower hip and her shin touched his still motionless leg. “I think...I’m pretty sure I was not the first. There was a little picture scraped into the old drywall, like it had been done with a fingernail. It was a stick figure and flower. I still have the image clearly in my mind. I never found out for sure, but I think they meant to sell me. It was only afterward, when I did my own research that I found out about the prevalence of human trafficking. At the time, I couldn’t fathom why this had happened to me. All I knew was that I wanted to go home and that I didn’t want to die. I would do anything for those things. The first time someone came in to give me granola bars, I tried to plead and reason. I told him that I was a good kid, that I missed my parents, and that I would never tell anyone. He didn’t respond. He threw the food and a water bottle on the bed and left. I was chained there for a few days. My head is still pretty scrambled. That part is still all a blur. One day I heard the car start up outside and crunch away on the gravel driveway. It felt like the sound woke me up. I dislocated my thumb to get out of the handcuffs. The door was locked and the window was nailed shut. My only chance was to break the window. If it hadn’t been an old single pane window, I wouldn’t have made it out of that room. Still, I knew I only had one chance to break through. There was no way they had both left the house. I had to break through the window and run. Fortunately the bedpan was aluminum instead of steel. I was able to slowly bend it by standing on it and give it a more pointed end. I clutched the blunt end to my chest and ran at the window with all my might. It broke, but my face was cut and my ribs fractured. I hit the ground running anyway. I was almost into the trees when the door banged open and the remaining man shouted. There was blood in my eyes and mouth, but didn’t slow down or look back. I heard a gunshot, but I don’t know if he chased me. I just ran and ran with fear as my fuel. I was in shock and not thinking clearly. I ran out onto the first road I saw, just so relieved to see evidence of civilization in the forest. Unfortunately, I ran out in front of a car. They weren’t able to stop in time and my arm was partially torn off. I was very fortunate that the lady who hit me was rich enough to have a car phone, even back then. She used her shawl as a tourniquet and soothed me until paramedics arrived. I only know that because she told me after. Allura and I have remained friends. My memories don’t start again until 2 months later, though apparently I was conscious before that. Dr. Banks calls it dissociation.” 

A deep rasping breath broke into his monologue. 

“It would make sense if my ordeal was over once I was safe, but it was not. My face healed and my parents bought me the best prosthetic money could buy at the time, which was like a toy compared to the one I have now. In spite of that, my brain still seems to be broken. I have panic attacks regularly and some days I can’t get out of bed. Doing everyday things can take so much fucking effort sometimes.” 

His speech lurched to a halt and he stared deadpan at the tent roof. There was a moment of silence. Then Pidge couldn’t hold it in any longer, she let out a muffled quiet sob and rubbed tears off her very wet face. It made Shiro’s own eye burn for the first time that evening. He rolled over and draped his metal and plastic arm over her. Their noses were only centimeters apart. 

Shiro whispered, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you.” 

Pidge furrowed her brow. She removed her the hand clutching his arm to stroke his hair gently. “Please don’t apologize. I’m glad you shared with me. I wanted to know you more deeply and you gave me what I asked for. You didn’t hurt me Shiro. It was those awful men who hurt someone I would one day care about.” 

Shiro realized that her glasses had prevented him from noticing how beautiful her eyes were. They were large compared to her small face, and currently they looked at him with an obvious expression of compassion. That night they slept holding eachother close.

The next morning Shiro was comforted to awaken with her small body so close. Still very groggy, he gently planted a kiss on her forehead before realized what he had done. He went stiff and tense. What the fuck Takashi?! That was totally inappropriate and she is surely pissed. A few silent seconds ticked by. He realized she was still totally zonked out, with no awareness of his indiscretion. He relaxed. Then the image of her in a bathing suit the day before intruded suddenly in his mind. The metal image instantly sent ample amounts of blood between his legs. Not good! He sat up suddenly and pushed her away from him roughly. 

“Wass’a matter Shiro. See uh bug?” Pidge mumbled in a sleep heavy voice.

“Yeah, I mean, no. I didn’t. I just needed a bit of space.” 

Pidge looked a bit more awake suddenly, “I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable. I would have moved back to my side of the tent if you asked. You were just so warm. I can go outside if you want.” The disappointment and concern on her face hurt him. 

“NO! No need. I will….Sorry” and he dashed out the tent flap, clutching his pillow to his crotch. 

“Where are you taking your pill……OH!” and then it dawned on her. She broke down into giggles. It was way too early for that kind of hilarity. She curled up in Shiro’s still warm spot and went back to sleep.

-

Pidge had coffee in her hands and was becoming more human, slowly. Lance, Hunk, and Keith were in camp chairs chowing down some milk and cereal from plastic bowls. 

Shiro strode out of the woods to join them. “Hey Pidge. Would you walk down to the river with me for a moment. I want to speak with you” 

Hunk’s eyebrows danced a little samba on his forehead as he watched them go. Lance and Keith continued to eat cereal obviously. 

Once down by the dock, Shiro cleared his throat uncomfortably. “This seems to be a trend in our friendship, but I really wanted to apologize for my behavior this morning.” 

Pidge laughed loudly. “Don’t worry about it. Boners are a totally natural morning occurrence for guys.”

Shiro actually hid his hands behind his face. “Oh quiznak. Your brother is going to think I tried to debauch his little sister.” 

Pidge’s tone became stern and a bit defiant. “First of all, it is none of his business. Second of all I am not little.” 

Shiro peeked over his fingers to raise an eyebrow at her. 

“Ok! Well, I’m not a child anyway! Whose boners I lay next to is totally up to me.” 

Shiro’s face burned like the surface of a star. “That really doesn’t make me feel better.” 

“Well it should. I’m an adult woman capable of my own decisions. Those decisions are entirely my own. Especially the ones on the subject of boners.” 

Shiro suddenly reached out, grabbing Pidge by the shoulders and shook her slightly. His eyes were wide with panic.“HOLY CROW! Please, stop saying boner!” 

Pidge laughed even louder this time “Boner. boner. boner!” 

Shiro let go of her and turned on his heel, making a speedy escape from a situation he thought might make his face catch fire.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long chapter this time, but it's full of good stuff. And by good stuff I mean fluff! Up to and including unoriginal cuddling tropes. I just can't help myself! Haha.

The gang was determined to enjoy their last full day of camping. Shiro went down to fish off the dock. Hunk was working on his famous dutch oven jambalaya recipe. Keith announced that he planned to take a hike, one that was marked on the trail map. Lance decided that he needed to go too, because anything Keith could do, he could do better. 

“I don't think that's advisable.” Pidge said. 

“Oh yeah?” Lance shot back.

“Uh yeah. I feel like there is a good chance you guys will tussle over the edge of a cliff or something.”

“Pfft. That kind of stuff only happens in cartoons.” Lance said dismissively.

”I think this is the type of situation where you should ask yourself WWSD.”

“Huh?” Lance was confused.

“What would Shiro do?”

“Why don’t you go ask him.” Lance said. “In the meantime, I’m going to show Keith how mountain climbing is really done.”

“Uh. We’re not going mountain climbing, Lance. It’s just a hike.”

After they had been on the trail for about 25 minutes, Lance pointed out a path leading uphill. 

“Looks like a game trail.” Keith commented. “We should stay on the main path though. It’s surprisingly easy to get lost in the woods, and we didn’t bring a compass.”

“Pshhhaw. You might get lost easily, but I’m like a human compass myself.” Lance said proudly. “I am an adventurer who takes the path less traveled.”

Lance charged up the hill without a backwards glance. Keith sighed, shrugged, and followed reluctantly after him. The path dwindled after about a mile. 

“You still going Keith?” Lance asked snidely. 

“You know it, you?” Keith shot back.

“Going? I’m speeding up!”

“Oh yeah? Me too.”

“Must be getting close.”

“Must be”

“You getting scared?”

“I'm not scared!”

Their bickering eventually petered out as they both realized that they were helplessly lost. There was no sign of the rock formation they were trying to reach the top of and no sign of the path they had left behind.

“Remember how you said it was a bad idea to leave the trail?” Lance said.

“Yeah.” Keith responded. “You made fun of me for that.” 

Lance crossed his arms defiantly. “And I’m proud of that, but it turns out it is exactly like that mumbo jumbo.” 

They wandered aimlessly for fifteen minutes, before it began to rain and the wind picked up. Keith was shivering and Lance’s teeth were chattering audibly. They were forced to take shelter under an evergreen tree. The space was small and they had to sit on the needle strewn ground, but at least it was dry. Keith’s bangs were dripping water into his face. They were both freezing their butts off. 

“So I saw this documentary one time,” Lance stuttered through his chattering teeth “It was about survivalists and stuff. They said… Well, it mentioned that….Uh….you see…”

Keith cut over his babbling. “Are you trying to ask me to cuddle for warmth?”

“Yes, ohmygod, please! I’m so cold.” Lance said earnestly. 

They scooted closer and sort of awkwardly waved their arms around for a moment, trying to decide how best to do this. They settled on Keith sitting sideways on Lance’s lap. Lance wrapped his long noodly arms around Keith and buried his face into the shoulder in front of him. After a few moments their body quakes subsided. 

“Hey, Keith.” Lance said uncomfortably. “Don’t tell anyone I said this, but I’m sorry that I didn’t listen to you earlier. I just got excited.”

“It’s all good.” Keith said dismissively. “You’re just an exuberant dude.”

“Exuberant.” Lance pushed his face harder into Keith’s shoulder, muffling his voice. “That’s a nice way of saying annoying.”

“Who said you were annoying?” Keith asked.

Lance shrugged, “Girls mostly.”

“Don’t sell yourself short.”

“That’s nice of you.” Lance said with a chuckle “But a guy like you can’t really know what it’s like. I’m sure you have no problem getting a girlfriend.” 

“You are pretty far off the mark. You are the flirty one, not me.”

“It’s just part of the job as a bartender.” Lance told him. “I get better tips that way. But it's not like anyone takes me seriously. I bet girls take you seriously.” 

“Like I said dude, pretty far off the mark.”

“Oh come on!” Lance pulled away slightly. “I’m trying to be open with you here and you are acting like this? Don't pretend like you have less pull with the ladies just to make me feel better. It just makes me feel worse and pathetic.”

Keith turned to look Lance full in the face. “Uh, no dude. I mean, off the mark because I’m not attracted to women.”

Lance’s jaw dropped, his eyes widened, and he froze a moment. Then he seemed to come back to life. His head twitched back and forth a few times. 

He gestured wildly. “Wha, wha, what?! You’re gay?” 

“Oh yeah. I thought everyone knew that.” Keith said nonchalantly. “Looks like the rain stopped. We can head out now” he was ignoring Lance’s frozen face and gaping mouth.

Lance scrambled to follow him. “Wait, what? Everyone knows you're gay, but nobody told me about it? How am I so out of the loop? Have I been asleep?”

The going was much easier now that the rain had stopped, but it had left the ground slippery with mud. Fortunately for the boys, just as panic started to seep into their minds, they heard Shiro shouting from the trail. They emerged from the brush covered in mud. Shiro looked relieved, Hunk seemed upset and a bit overwhelmed. Pidge meanwhile gave them a knowing tight lipped smile and said, “That's what you get for going against my recommendations.”

After dark had truly settled in that night, the gang carried some camp chairs down to the dock. They set them up on the wooden pier to stargaze. It was lovely moonlit scene that all 5 of them enjoyed immensely. 

-

It had been a few weeks since the conclusion of their epic camping trip. Pidge was beginning to feel concerned, because Shiro had not answered her texts all day. She felt like he usually took an obnoxious amount of time to answer, but he always did answer eventually. She finally decided to text Keith. 

Pidge: Hey Keith. It’s Pidge. I was wondering if you have seen Shiro today. He hasn’t been answering my texts. I just want to make sure he isn’t dead in a ditch somewhere. 

Keith: Hello. I haven’t seen him. He called in sick today though. He is probably at home sleeping it off. 

Pidge: Thanks. Can I get his address? I think I will go check on him to see how he’s doing. 

-

Shiro had been pacing around his flat for hours. Occasionally venting his feelings by knocking objects off their shelves as he passed. If he stopped moving, he felt like he would explode. He was so weak. Hiding in his room and throwing objects around like a toddler. He would have given anything to be someone else. Someone whose skin and brain weren’t crawling with the itchy, pinchy, tingle-ies. He felt trapped, but the idea of going outside to face the light of day was out of the question. He couldn’t let anyone see him like this. 

Then he heard a knock at the door. He crept up to the peep hole, fully intending to ignore whoever it was. When he saw that it was Pidge wearing a concerned expression, his heart did several somersaults. He couldn’t let her in. He couldn’t let her see him like this. He glanced around wildly, as if for an escape route. Pidge knocked again, a little harder this time. Before his brain had caught up to his body he lunged forward and yanked the door open. 

“Hey Shiro. Keith told me that you were home sick today. I brought you some soup from my favorite deli. Can I come in?”

Shiro scratched the back of his head, not making eye contact. “Well, you see. It’s not a great time. I doubt you really want to come in. I’m really not feeling well…”

Pidge’s eyes darted past him into the gloomy interior of his trashed apartment. Her eyes grew wide—concern was thick in her voice. “Did something happen? Your place looks like it went zero G for a few hours.”

Shiro glanced back at the chaotic disarray of his possessions. When he turned back, he met Pidge’s eye for the first time that day. “I haven’t really felt like myself today. I suppose I was a bit hysterical. Please don’t worry. I didn’t break anything and I will probably feel better tomorrow. Thank you for stopping by.” He reached out to take the soup container, but Pidge did not hand it over. 

“So can I come in? I can help pick this stuff up.” she said.

“That really isn't necessary. I appreciate the offer, but you don't have to hang around. I’m not going to be much fun today.” Shiro reached to take the food container once more. Pidge deliberately pulled it beyond his reach.

“I’m not offering because I have to.” She told him matter-of-factly. “I am doing it because I want to. If you genuinely want me to leave, then I will go. I didn’t come to have fun. I came to help you feel better. If it isn’t a cold that’s got you down, then we can come at it from a different angle.”  
With a sudden motion she tossed the plastic soup container over her shoulder. It sailed over the edge of the balcony and splatted on the concrete two stories below. Shiro’s eyes were wide with shock. Pidge glanced behind her, then back at Shiro’s dumbstruck face before bursting into peals of laughter. Shiro couldn’t help but quietly join in. 

“I guess I had better let you in before you totally deface my downstairs neighbor's porch.” Shiro held the door open and Pidge stepped under his arm into the thrashed room. 

Shiro shut the door before he awkwardly turned to face her. “You don’t have to clean this stuff up. It’s not bothering me.”

“Cool. It doesn’t bug me either.” Pidge said nonchalantly as she plopped down onto the black plush couch. 

Shiro perched on the seat beside her. On several occasions he had imagined what it would be like to have Pidge come over to his place. None of those fantasies had involved them casually sitting in the detritus of a panic attack. 

“I’m, uh, sorry.” Shiro said awkwardly. 

“No need to apologize. It’s like I said before, I’m only here because I want to be. I’m here to listen if you want to talk about what has you feeling all wacked out. If you don’t want to, we could talk about other stuff or watch a movie. We could even just sit here in silence if that’s what is most comfortable for you.” 

Shiro fidgeted with the hem of his shirt, suddenly aware that he had never changed out of his pajamas. “Thanks.” he said quietly.

“Any time.” Pidge told him. She leaned back and kicked her feet up on the coffee table. 

There were several long moments of silence before Shiro spoke again. “I guess this morning I kind of got caught up in thinking about who I am and who I could have been. Who I might have been if I hadn’t gone through all that shit.”

Pidge reached a hand over and rested it on Shiro’s shoulder, “But I like who you are now.” she told him.

Shiro turned to face her. Looking intently into her eyes, as if searching for a trace of a comforting lie. “It’s not that I hate myself. I know that I have worked hard and am a better person for it. It’s just that all these little changes I’ve fought years to make, they seem like nothing compared to how much I was changed in just a few days.” Pidge took Shiro’s hand. He smiled thinly at her before he continued. “My face and my arm are constant visual reminders that I will never be who I used to think I would become one day. I feel ashamed. I know that most people change over time, but I had no control. Sometimes I feel like a newspaper being blown about and shredded by the wind. I just react and never get to pilot.”

He looked up when Pidge jerked her hand out of his grasp. She was leaping to her feet with a manic glint in her eye. “Put some pants on. I have an idea. We are going to the store.”

“Store?” Shiro was confused “What store?”

“Just the pharmacy down the street. It shouldn’t take long. You coming or what?”

Shiro hesitated. He hadn’t intended on leaving the house that day, but his curiosity was getting the better of him. He got dressed and followed as she marched to drugstore on the corner. Once inside she hooked him by the elbow and drug him to the hair dye aisle. He turned to raise a confused eyebrow at her. 

“Let’s make a change you DO have control over.” She grinned up at him. 

He was looking back, slightly bewildered. “You mean, like, dye my hair?”

“Yeah! People do it all the time. Everyone you know will instantly see the difference between yesterday Shiro and tomorrow Shiro. You don’t even have to dye the whole thing. Just the front-lock would look cool too.” 

Shiro glanced blankly up and down the long aisle of dye. “But I don’t even know what color I would want.”

“You could do blonde!” Pidge released his arm to leap forward and point at the section. 

“I don't know. Don't you think I would look like a lifeguard or something?”

Pidge burst out laughing. “Now that is a mental image I will cherish for the rest of my life. You would only look like a beach bum if you went a super yellowy-gold blonde. There are different kinds of bleach you know? To be clear, I only know that because I’ve helped my mom dye her hair before.”

They purchased the appropriate materials and returned to Shiro’s apartment. Shiro was perched on a stool while Pidge read instructions. 

“This says that it can ruin clothes. I don’t care about what I’ve got on, but you don’t want to ruin your nice athletic shirt.” She turned to face him and it looked like her eyebrows would disappear up into her hairline “You could just take it off. It’s a lot easier to wipe off skin.”

Shiro’s cheeks burned pink, but he pulled his shirt over his head without protest. Pidge promptly dropped the applicator brush she had been holding. Luckily it hadn’t been dipped into the bleach yet. After she dove to retrieve it, she took a tentative step towards the now half naked man. 

“So, uh, did you want to do all of it or just the front?” She was looking intently anywhere but at his newly exposed skin. 

“Just the front I think. See how it goes. Then decide from there.” He smiled encouragingly at her.

She came forward to stand between his knees. After separating the portion she intended to dye, she secured the back section with the headband from her own hair. 

Shiro fluttered his eyelashes up at her. “Do I look pretty now?” 

It had precisely the desired effect of making her giggle. She set to work spreading the chilly mixture into his hair. It was fortunate that the stool he was perched on was so low to the ground, given their height difference. However, she did have to stand quite close to see her work. This meant that her chest was directly in front of his face. She was wearing her usual bulky sweater, but he remembered all too vividly what was underneath. He tried to look anywhere else, but his eyes kept darting back. Everytime this happened, he would glance up to her face with desperate apology in his eyes. She was too concentrated on the task at hand to notice though. 

She was standing close enough that he could feel the heat of her body and breath. It contrasted nicely with the very cold goop he could feel being spread on the front of his head. In what he felt was all too short of a time, she stepped back and declared it to be done. He perched on the couch, careful not to bump or lean against anything. After the brush and bowl were rinsed, Pidge came into join him. She pulled out her phone and put on some of her favorite funny YouTube video’s to pass the time. After the directed interval, he retreated into the bathroom to rinse. 

He was leaned over the edge of the tub, watching the goop swirl down the drain. He chuckled thinking about the look on his boss's face when he turned up for work with his new do. He was a bit nervous, but mostly excited. He knew that he would forever associate the smell of bleach with the feisty young lady sitting out on his couch. He ran his fingers through his hair, checking for any lingering bleach. It seemed to be completely rinsed. He reached for his towel and rubbed it vigorously over his head a few times. Straightening to look in the mirror, his eyes grew wide. Wow! It looked even better than he had hoped. Pidge had done a great job separating the portion to be bleached. Shiro glanced at a shirt that was hanging on a peg beside the door. Nah, it’s not like he really NEEDED it. It was pretty warm tonight. 

“Man, you are really good at this! It came out great,” He was saying as he rounded the corner into the kitchen. He stopped dead in his tracks as he took in the scene before him. Pidge had a shocked and panicked expression on her face. Her trembling hands held a large pair of scissors, no doubt pulled from the bulwark of objects on the livingroom floor. All around her feet were piles of red-blonde hair. What remained on her head didn’t even reach her shoulders. It stuck out jauntily around her face. Shiro guessed she had lopped at least 8 inches off. He realized his mouth was hanging open and closed it. 

Pidge let the scissors clatter to the floor. “I can’t believe I did it! I guess I wanted to take my own advice. I wanted to be my best authentic self too. I always hated my long hair. I always felt pressured to keep it by my mom and brother. But when you were in the bathroom I saw the scissors on the ground and I don’t know what came over me. What the quiznack?! I just felt like I had to come clean, but I’m afraid it will change the way everyone thinks about me. I'm just... I just don't want any more secrets between us. I mean, it's just a haircut. But honestly, I feel really liberated now.”

Her rambling was cut short when Shiro quickly closed the distance between them. Before either of them could register what was happening, he was kissing her. He cradled her face in both his hands. After a few moments, or maybe years they broke apart. 

He smiled down at her warmly. “Pidge, owning who you are is going to make you a better person. Which is saying something, because you are already pretty amazing. I’m proud of you.”

Pidge heaved a sigh. “Feels good to get that off my chest, and to have finally gotten to kiss you.”

“Wait. Finally?” Shiro cocked an eyebrow at her. “How long have you wanted that to happen?” 

“Oh probably since the first time I ever saw you” she replied casually. 

“Maybe I should have done it sooner.” 

“Maybe.” She shrugged. “It worked out well, though. Now I want to kiss you because you mean so much to me. Back then I just thought you were hott.”

-

Lance, Hunk, and Pidge were gathered around a table at the library. Pidge’s laptop was open in front of her and she was typing away furiously. Lance had his chair precariously perched on the back two legs. He was watching Hunk construct a rather elaborate paper airplane. 

Without looking up from his work Hunk asked, “Seen Shiro since the camping trip, Pidge?”

Pidge stopped typing and bit her lip. “Actually, yes. I saw him yesterday.”

“Oh yeah? Bump into him at your coffee shop again?” Hunk inquired.

“Not exactly. I went over to his place if you must know.”

Lance’s chair crashed back down to all four legs. He ignored the reproachful stares from the table next to them. “You went to his house? Holy crow, Pidge! Did you guys kiss?”

Pidge flushed scarlet. “You could say that.”

Lance slapped a hand down on the table. “I was only teasing, but you really did! Super freaky!”

Hunk shrugged. “It was only a matter of time. Didn’t you see him making moon eyes at her after they got back from kayaking?”

Lance shook his head. “Everything’s gone apples and bananas. Pidge and Shiro are getting together. Got together on the very day that Keith and I went to the arcade.”

Pidge closed her laptop to allow her piercing stare to hit more of Lance. “Why would you do that? Aren't you guys like arch nemesis?” 

Lance waved a hand airily. “I guess I’ve just matured.” 

Hunk snorted. “Pfft. It’s just that you didn't know Keith liked men. You were only shoving him away to save yourself the pain of disappointment. Now you don’t have to.” 

“What the cheese, Hunk! I’ve never said any of that.” 

“I know. You didn’t have to. Remember how I knew you were bi long before you did. It’s just my gift.” Hunk finally looked up from his paper airplane.

“Man, who needs a fortune teller when we have you around. Warn me next time bro!” Lance said in exasperation.

Hunk patted his arm kindly, though a bit patronizingly. “If only that was how it worked, my friend.”

Pidge shifted her piercing look to Hunk. “So are you just in everyone’s heads all the time? I don’t know if I like that.”

“You can look in my head hole!” Hunk exclaimed defensively.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hunk is the friend we all want, but few of us deserve. Lol.  
> Also, next chapter is probably where the smut begins!


End file.
